Erin’s Story

As I went throughout my life before I knew Christ, I always tried to find acceptance in others. For example, I would need to find acceptance in my family. I am the oldest and knew that I had to lead by good examples for my brother and sister; so, I worked hard for my grades and was involved in many activities. I had to find acceptance in my friends. My freshman and sophomore years of high school were difficult as I did not have many friends to lean on nor did I have that big group of friends that hung out regularly. However, I did find this group of friends my junior and senior year and really enjoyed the rest of high school. I also found acceptance by dating someone my junior and senior year.

As you can see, the last two years of high school my life revolved around relationships. To feel accepted, my relationships with my friends and boyfriend had to be continued outside of school.

This was unfulfilling when my parents or something stopped me from hanging out with my friends or the boyfriend. I felt lonely if no one wanted to hang out with me. I wanted so badly to have deep, meaningful relationships with the people around me that I strived to make those relationships, even if they were unhealthy. I realized this when I came to college and I would hang out with someone just because I thought they would accept me as their friend.

My life changed when I got involved with a freshman bible study. My RA was also the bible study leader where she encouraged me to go to CRU’s fall retreat. There I received Christ as my Savior. Jesus Christ had always been in my life and I knew what He had done, but I did not have a personal relationship with him until then. I instead concentrated on relationships with other people and I continually struggled throughout high school to find those relationships.

I was very excited after I received Christ. My attitude became hopeful in knowing that I would not be left alone and I would make friends soon. By going to the fall retreat, I had met a ton of people from my floor, and who went to my bible study. Pretty soon we were all hanging out!

The work of the Holy Spirit in my life after I received Christ started out a little slow. I did not recognize the amount of change that could happen in my life until the second semester of my sophomore year. You see, I had this boyfriend whom I still looked for acceptance in; this relationship went on for another 1 1/2 after I received Christ. This ended, and I became a lot more active in my relationship with God and with the fellowship of CRU. I was in the Word daily and I became a member of Conference Team. I was able to see that I did not need acceptance in other people but that I was already accepted into God’s will.

My life has changed in that I know I am always accepted into Christ’s family. He will never leave me and I will always have someone to lean on. I noticed this change when I relied on God to carry me through the break-up of my relationship and my reliance on Him has grown ever since. Because of this, I am motivated in knowing that God has some amazing plans for me. He has allowed me to go through these struggles for the purpose of me learning about His grace and sovereignty.